Posted in art, Music, poetry, writing

About This I Am Right

About This I am Right  I knead my thumb into my palm, pausing at each callus,  the evidence of effort, the roughness of imperfections, of making a fool of myself in trying.   My hands aren’t soft, they bleed in the cold air, they sting against my tears, they tire, they fail and the holding on hurts more.   My hands aren’t soft,  and the calluses scrape, but if you let me let go, I promise you’re making a mistake. Of this I am right.

There are some poems that hurt to write. I read through them and exhale. This one hurt, but I remember they’re just words and I’m stronger than their verse.

–Leanne Rebecca

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Posted in art, poetry, writing

Holding On

Holding On   He didn’t remember gasping at 4am, suffocating on his own spit, drowning from the inside out, tinged the same gray-blue as his eyes squinting through water at the hospice nurse as she suctioned his airway.   He woke the next day to a ring of his children around his bed, aged faces laced in silence, not knowing what to say to a man that watched his wife die two weeks earlier, a spectator from three feet away.   Dad, it’s ok, they spoke up, words disappearing like wind, an obligatory breeze disregarding how close he’d come to letting go.   He didn’t know why they’d come or why they were blinking tears, but they were sorry his throat hurt.

I’ve been MIA. I know it. You know it too and I owe you an explanation:

I’m currently editing a poetry book that has been a couple years in the making. It’s nearing the stage of “completion,” which I put in quotations because I’m not sure I will ever be able to say I’m 100% satisfied with my writing. Poetry is a process that takes time and evolves as we grow and change. Anyway, I’m throwing myself into the collection and sadly as a result, I’ve held my breath on here.

I’m sorry!

Posts might be sparse in the upcoming weeks as I work through the editing process and enter into the nightmare that is the publishing world. I promise I will never forget you and even in the silence, I hear you.

Thank you for your patience.

–Leanne Rebecca

Posted in Music, poetry, twenty one pilots, writing

Fall Away

Fall AwayThis piece jumped out at me this morning as I scoured my Word document of poems named after twenty one pilots tracks, my ongoing Saturday series on She’s in Prison. Something about this poem grabbed me as I reflect and recover from a car accident a couple days ago.

As always, check out the twenty one pilots version of “Fall Away” below and find the archives from my other TOP titled poems HERE.