I should be in bed by now, but I just couldn’t sleep without writing this poem. Now that it’s done, I bid you goodnight…
–Leanne
I should be in bed by now, but I just couldn’t sleep without writing this poem. Now that it’s done, I bid you goodnight…
–Leanne
It’s amazing how the stories in our brains can seem so different than what everyone else sees. We all have our own realities. Only you know your truth. Love anyway.
–Leanne
Just appreciating the little things and trying to keep life from passing by too quickly.
–Leanne
This morning I read through the past 2 years of poems I’ve posted on here. It didn’t take long since my consistency with posting has wavered. I’d forgotten about most of them but it took only seconds to remember where I’d been when I wrote them and what emotions were controlling my pen at the time. It’s been a hell of a couple years. I shunned dating, moved back in with my parents, fell in love, had my heart broken, hated life, went through a couple different jobs and two surgeries, started grad school, lost myself, rediscovered forgotten passions, found myself again, loved life, remembered what it felt like to have a crush on someone and how painful unrequited lust can be. I’ve watched friends and family marry, move away, and follow their dreams while others have struggled through breakups. I’ve questioned my choices and realized that I still don’t know what I want to be when I grow up. I know one thing though, I feel home when I’m writing.
Thanks for sticking with me through it all.
–Leanne
She’s in Prison has been my baby for 2 1/2 years, and possibly the most crucial 2 1/2 years in terms of growing up. I can look back through the archives and relive all the phases of my early 20’s. Now I enter a new phase of discovering who I am while sharing all of me with another person.
If you’ve noticed my absence on here the past couple months it’s because I’ve been doing just that: dedicating every spare moment I have to falling helplessly in love.
I hope you had a great weekend!
–Leanne Rebecca
It’s been so long since I’ve posted a poem on here that I feel as if I should reintroduce myself. Hi, my name is Leanne. I’ve taken brief hiatuses from She’s in Prison before, usually the result of needing to take time to sort through emotional challenges or press the reset button on life to overcome various struggles. This break, however, was purely the result of being so happy that I didn’t need poetry for a minute.
–Leanne Rebecca
Today someone said to me that the light in my eyes has returned. It struck me (in a good way) to hear that. I know the moment that it came back. It was the moment I decided to stop dating.
For three years I’ve bounced from date to date from guy to guy, crashing and burning over and over and over again, convinced in the end that I was incapable of sustaining a romantic relationship, that I was somehow less than, unworthy. The more I dated the more I lost myself.
About a month ago I called it quits, not from exasperation, but from a deep desire to explore my own heart, discover what I love and feed my passions with as much attention as they deserve. For the first time in three years all the pressure is gone and I’m rediscovering the girl I once was, a girl unafraid to sing her spirit, that dances in the car like no one is watching.
I never thought I’d say that the best decision I ever made for myself was to stop dating, after all, we all want to find true love and everyone says the only way to find it is to put yourself out there. But if there’s one lesson I can take away from this last month of soul searching it’s that there’s no hurry.
Take care of yourselves my loves!
–Leanne
It’s been a hot minute since I wrote a poem. Lots of life has happened in the past couple weeks and I’ve barely been able to catch my breath. I’ve had to let many ideas die in the wind, barely able to find the time to eat dinner, let alone write anything. I wish time could pause sometimes.
Side note: everything right now is inspired by Paramore.
Good night!
–Leanne Rebecca
Tonight I thought I’d offer a little insight into my writing process. I have a relationship with my notebooks. I can look at each one sitting on my shelf and remember what phase I was going through at the time. That black and tan one with the ripped binding holds the pain of moving away from my best friends after college. The light blue one was filled in a single coffee shop during a period of extreme loneliness while drinking almond milk lattes every day. The pastel swirled one is dedicated to Twenty One Pilots. The zebra striped one holds the heartache of unrequited love. The orange one is when I started facing my demons. I could keep going.
I love holding a pen in my hand and feeling the energy of emotion flow through. I love being able to scribble through thoughts, keeping the record of struggle and indecision tangible. I like that I edit as I go, reminded of the imperfection at every glance. Writing is a messy art and I crave that hand to paper connection. Computers are convenient, but if given the choice I choose a notebook every time.
I hope your weekend was splendid. Sleep well my friends.
Love,
Leanne
I ran out of time today to do everything that I wanted to do. I need to remember that it doesn’t make me a failure, but that my life is full.
Tonight I’m listening to acoustic Sleeping with Sirens and Grizfolk. I want to lose myself in the lyrics like I did yesterday at Warped Tour, closing my eyes and feeling the music of each band, letting it grab hold of my soul and claim a part of me, even for just a second.
I discovered a band called Onward Etc. If there’s one thing you’ll take away from this blog post, it’s to listen to them and find your own poem in their lyrics.
Good night loves.
–Leanne Rebecca