Posted in desire, love, poetry

Geometry

We’ve aligned ourselves in a conundrum, standing in a circle that doesn’t connect, dancing round and round this game of heartache, tripping out of line, falling in passion's trap, waiting for the hand next door to pull us back into the flirtation of friendship, the guise of fitting together, sucked deep into the mystery of not quite chemistry, the him and the me and the him and the her and the us confused by timing, by equations we can’t solve. So we walk side by side at an impasse, frustrated by the same emotion, all in love but not with the right one.

I’ve been thinking a lot about love lately. One of my best friends just got engaged and we’ve been talking about how she knew that he was her partner for life. Her answer, simple and honestly vague, is that something deep inside her just knew.

There’s no common factor that can explain why sometimes we feel romantic chemistry and sometimes we don’t. There’s no trick to lining up that connection. I’ve always been someone that feels it right away and in my experience, no matter how much time I spend with a person doesn’t change whether or not that spark is there. I do believe that love is a decision, ultimately, but it’s foundation is built upon that invisible force that draws you to each other. It’s frustrating when chemistry just misses or when bad timing prevents the heart from sensing it. There are no set paths to falling in love and that exploration, that heartbreak, that discovery, that journey is why we write.

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Posted in art, poetry, writing

Daydream

Daydream  My brain got lost in making pancakes, hands moving in autopilot, measuring and mixing without need for consciousness, the steps ingrained in muscle memory.  I wasn’t in the room, hovering over the griddle, sprinkling chocolate chips. I’d floated into my future, grasping at visions of the you that doesn’t exist and how you’d tickle my waist as I flipped our pancakes.  I laughed and you hugged me from behind as I piled the cakes onto the serving plate your aunt gave us at our wedding.  I’m sorry you had to go  before you could eat any.  I wrapped them in plastic  so you could have them later.

I put my iTunes on shuffle this morning and the first 3 songs that came up all had the word “daydream” in the title. I wonder how much time in the day I spend lost in my own head, making up stories and pretending like I did as a kid. We never really grow out of that. We just learn to act out the scenes inside our brains instead of with toys.

I hope you have a glorious Saturday!

–Leanne Rebecca

Posted in art, poetry, writing

Addicted to Disney

Addicted to DisneyThis one’s an oldie. I just watched Mirror Mirror, a silly take on Snow White starring Lily Collins and Julia Roberts, so it seemed like an appropriate throwback. It was published in Pastiche Magazine (a small online journal) last summer during my run as their featured poet for the month of July. It’s strange to look back at previous writings. It’s hard not to judge myself and also bittersweet to experience the emotions from a distance, especially poems that dive into dark scary places I never want to visit again. I think it’s important to look back though and see how far I’ve grown in so many aspects of my self and my work.

A question to my fellow writers:

Do you ever look back at old work and do you find it difficult to look at it objectively?

Oh, and follow me on Twitter. …please.

Posted in art, Music, poetry, twenty one pilots, writing

The Pantaloon

Last night I went to my 5th twenty one pilots concert in less than a year. They added one of my favorite songs to their set, an older one from a few years ago. Experiencing the song in person reinforced my admiration for the story behind the lyrics and the brilliance of the musicality. It’s a track I’ve listened to at least a thousand times and I never expected to hear it live. Long story short, it made choosing tonight’s poem simple, since Saturdays are conveniently my ‘twenty one pilots titled poetry‘ days. I present to you, my version of “The Pantaloon:”The PantaloonAs always, check out the twenty one pilots version too!